I hate to admit it… you’re going to think I’m such a Grinch… but I cringe when my friends ask me for my address right before the holidays… I immediately sigh… knowing that FOR SURE… I will be receiving either an invitation to a party that I won’t want to go to because of my social anxiety disorder and low self-esteem or an ADORABLY CUTE Holiday Card that will no doubt prove my life to be meaningless and further authentication that I shall remain divorced and alone… FOREVER!
I know I am being a bit dramatic, I actually love the holidays. I love to see friends and family, to give and to receive, but they can also really wear you down… and for us double winners out there, we have to be prepared!
So, I wanted to provide you with a few tricks that I use to skate through without complication…
- If you really don’t want to go… don’t go… there is nothing worse than having massive anxiety and attending a party where all you can think about is how much better everyone else is than you, that you’ve literally accomplished nothing worth talking about in the last twelve months, and if you have to hear one more person question your decision to not freeze your eggs… you literally might stop breathing in the middle of the room. Yep, that’s me… I’m a bipolar chick. My mood can fluctuate with absolutely no warning. The thing that I have learned over time is to “pick my battles.” If I don’t want to go, no one else will want me there either… trust me. Taking a shower and snuggling up to my pup and watching Netflix is sometimes the perfect solution to having nothing to wear and being on the verge of a social meltdown… Most people probably won’t even recognize you’re not there… as NO ONE is ALL THAT important anyway – thank you God.
- If you’re feeling up to it, or at least like you aren’t in danger of murdering the first happy person you see… then by all means… Go For It! Get out on the town, get all gussied up. Feel sexy during the one time of year that sequins is not only accepted, but is celebrated… and if there is one thing I love it is a flashy Holiday glam look. The best advice I can give you if you do venture out of your house, is to look well rested, stunning, and to be full before you go to a party, so you don’t shovel food into your face like a pig, while trying to humble brag about your latest “tragedy” in Malibu.
- The secret to being the life of the party is so simple it always makes me cringe that I failed at it for so many years… smile, nod, agree, appear interested, ask questions, repeat. It amazes me how much fun someone can have when you simply let them talk about themselves… try it as a social experiment. Try it on a date. As my mother always says, you should leave a first date with the man/woman not knowing anything about you… that way he/she has to ask you out again…
- Lay off the booze… especially the eggnog… that stuff is fattening and will steal your serenity slyly. If you’re worried about people wondering why you aren’t or are barely drinking – this delicious concoction is sure to throw them off guard – ginger ale with a twist of lime. It looks just like a rum or bourbon drink. #TotalStealthMove It’s slightly more unusual than your typical club soda or diet coke… no one will suspect a thing… You will go home feeling like you really worked the room, can remember what you talked about, or rather listened about, and can even splurge on a few extra cookies for dessert, since you’ll be avoiding the empty calories associated with alcohol. It really is a Win! Win!
- Remember that no matter what happens… if you put one foot in front of the other and you maintain the holistic approach to wellness of getting enough sleep, eating right, exercising, taking medication as prescribed, seeing the sunshine, hanging with family and friends (at least occasionally), and feeling like you are spiritually connected and helping others, you surely cannot fail. This recipe for balanced living, is simple, but not easy. However, it does translate into sane, peaceful living, which to me translates to happiness.
The holidays are mostly a snowball effect towards the most disappointing night of the year… New Year’s Eve… Just remember that life moves on, disappointment can only last seconds if you get really good at it… and sometimes God has a funny way of giftwrapping, so you never truly know the gifts you are getting until the time is revealed. I stay sane by finding peace in the harmony of nature, good will toward all men, and the feeling that I will always be taken care of… as long as I get enough sleep!